CLAUSTROPHOBIC

You know that suffocating feeling...where you feel your actual life depends on just getting one deep breath of fresh air...well, that is how I feel. Maybe I should actually do some deep breathing...But to be honest, this is how I have been feeling for a while now. And it all has to do with this blog. Don't get me wrong. I love my new domestic hobbies. So much! Problem is...being a "domestic diva" is just such a small part of who I am. I get tired of writing about just aspects relating to crafts and cooking. I don't know how these people do it, only writing about one aspect of their lives day after day. I just don't think I am cut out for that. Monotony is my greatest enemy. And frankly, I am all out of air...or words. Part of me wishes I could create post after post of cute crafts and amazing recipes. Or that I loved these things so much that I lived and breathed ideas. I absolutely adore all those cooking and style blogs out there.

However, reality is...labels can be kind of limiting. Being known for one skill, or in my case a "martha stewart wanna-be" is not all-encompassing like I thought it might be...far from it. Instead, it is actually restricting. If I am spending my time focused on crafts and cooking and cleaning...then, in turn, that means I am NOT spending my time with friends, or learning to scuba dive, or whatever else I might want to be doing. I initially liked the challenge of becoming a domestic diva...because it was so far from what I would have ever labeled myself. I liked that it was new. I liked that it was difficult for me. And I honestly like cooking and crafts more now than I did when I started...but I am realizing that what I really want to write about are those things PLUS all the other things I love too. I probably have too many interests...from travel, to eating exotic food, to reading, to anything and everything else. I like variety...probably more than anything else. Someone just told me, actually yesterday, that I seemed like I get bored easily. And I will admit - this is true. It doesn't mean I am incapable of keeping friends or commiting to things, but just that in my day to day life I must have adventure. I must have new activities, new scenery, new people to keep me interested and engaged in my surroundings. This is a tough to keep up...but thankfully, I am also easily entertained, so the simplest thing may be all I need. This is also what makes sitting at a desk everyday so painful for me...like actually physically painful. (or that could be how un-ergonomically I sit in my chair)

All this to say, I think I want to give my blog a makeover...slowly because I am super busy right now..I have procrastinated way too much with Christmas presents, but maybe I can get it ready in time for the new year. Not to worry...cooking and crafts will continue...but probably in less quantity because I will be living in Cambodia in February. Who knows what crazy stories I will have to share then...